Tracey made me cry in public
My friend Tracey wrote a post that I read at lunch alone today. IT MADE ME CRY IN PUBLIC!
It made me cry for many reasons.
- Tracey is an amazing women and amazing mother
- I am a HORRIBLE mother and wife that doesn’t do 1/2 of what she does
- I hope Tracey’s kids and ex-husband appreciate all that she does
Gist of the post is re-posted here:
Dear Ex-Husband,
NOTICE:
You write a child support check twice a month and have the boys every other weekend (if it’s convenient for you.)
* I fill out all of the school forms.
* I make all the school lunches. (I don’t do this)
* I wake up every morning to get the kids ready for school. (I don’t do this)
* I help with homework. (I don’t do this)
* I nag, cajole, plead, beg, bribe our kids to clean their rooms, do their homework, turn off the lights, flush the toilet, clean up after themselves.
* I listen when they are sad, hurt, angry, frustrated, defeated, inconsolable. (I don’t do this)
* I budget.
* I cook almost every meal. (I DEFINITELY don’t do this)
* I clean. (I do some of this but hire out most)
* I do the laundry.
* I make doctors appointments.
* I make dentist appointments.
* I take care of them when they are sick.
* I make arrangements for them for their summer activities. (I don’t do this)
* I talk to them about God. (I don’t do this)
* I talk to them about sex. (I don’t do this)
* I teach them about money.
* I am teaching one of them to drive, having researched the best way to do that. (I don’t do this)
* I make sure they have deodorant.
* I make sure they wear deodorant. (I don’t do this)
* I tuck them in. (I don’t do this)
* I kiss them goodnight.
* I get “one more drink of water”.
* I help them find their first job.
* I counsel them on their love life. (I don’t do this)
* I sign them up and take them to baseball practice. (I don’t do this)
* I attend every school meeting. (I don’t do this)
* I meet with the school counselor regarding college. (I don’t do this)
* I take them on tours of Universities. (I don’t do this)
* I watch over them EVEN when there is no power.
* I make arrangements for their safety in an emergency.
* I pick them up and drop them off.
* I wait up for them when they get home late.
* And all the other things I left off of this list because I am now going to make dinner.
* All of these things I do even if I am tired, sick, sad, depressed or even if I just don’t want to.I AM TAKING THE SUMMER OF 2009 OFF.
ABOVE IS YOUR LIST OF THINGS TO DO.
Looking at this list, I could do SO much more for my kids, for my husband, for our family, but I keep being told to take care of myself so that I CAN take care of them.
I feel like such a failure and can’t figure out how to make it all work better.
I wish I could be just a tiny bit more like Tracey; even just a tiny bit would be such an improvement over where I am now.
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